### lbs...

...no dates. No cigarrettes and no drinks.

(I love you Bridge!!! I'm glad you're back in movie form).

This past week was the 5th anniversary of the worst day of my life (9/11 the 2nd). Two days later, one of my best friends (who happens to be an ex bf) celebrated the 5th anniversary of the best day of his life.

It was my last year at A&M. A phone call at 6:30 a.m woke me up. It was Jen, saying Bonfire fell and there were four dead. I remember sitting down on my bed, and the first thought that comes to my mind is "I guess Bonfire is canceled this year".

The four became six. Then eleven. Then 12. If there's a number that Aggies identify with, it's twelve. The 12th Man. The symbol of the biggest tradition of all: If you need me, I'll be in the stands. When E. King Gil stood oh so many years ago, he didn't know he started the greatest college tradition of them all.

And oh, how tragic would the number 12 be on November 18th, 1999.

My last on campus yell practice was a week later. I cried like a little girl, because I knew it would be my last one in many, many years. We beat Texas (the last time we did so), in a very emotion-filled game.

Two days later, I got call (also from Jen) that my ex (who, a year after we broke up married another girl cuz, well, they were pregnant) had become a Dad. (Happy B-day, Ro!).

"It's the circle of life, man."

Many things can happen in five years. If five years ago, someone would have told me I would be back home, not only would I have not believed them, I would have done the impossible to keep me in the states. However, I had to leave Texas, take a detour through Ohio before heading back home. I lost my thyroid along the way. But I think it's worth it. I love my job, I love what I'm doing, and I'm sure I'm going to go places there.

Only problem is that there aren't any interesting guys (or guys interested in me here), apparently no one on the Island (or at least on the West Coast) cares about college football. My Mom says I'm Mexican because I love Mexican food (as if I would take that as an insult), my brothers gone (and married). And I feel absolutely alone.

If it weren't for church, I wouldn't know what to do with myself.

Oh, and school. Which is currently driving me to the brink of insanity.

Anyway, I gotta watch a new Sealab and chat with my ex. Later.